Heads Spinning Not Winning

Heads Spinning Not Winning

It feels weird when you’re on a ward, taking medicine in a new place and for some the first time. It’s sterile, it’s uncomfortable and it’s, personally, not pleasant.

For some reason these cups represent something personal to me and I cannot put my finger on exactly what that something is.

The idea of the cups being disposable and the patient using the cup also feeling disposable perhaps?

Is the ever increasing suicide rate indicating that medication alone is not enough?

Photo Collage in Photoshop

Here I have selected individual strips in photoshop and moved them vertically by an inch.

This has been really effective, although I prefer the outcome of the woven piece as it is more tactile and textural.

The process of weaving was therapeutic even if it was much more time consuming than using photoshop.

Ana Strips

Dialogues Symposium

Today I attended the Fine Art Dialogues Symposium at NUA.

Noel Douglas talked about this image, which I found particularly powerful as it is depicting how DWP can treat disabled people. This visual representation resonated with me as it sometimes feels like people with disabilities are left to struggle without much support…

But who is the illest?

Life Struggles.jpg

Lately I’ve been wondering why amongst the mental health community there is so much competition to have the most symptoms, the roughest deal in life or who is struggling the worst.

It’s so so easy to focus on all things negative, but why is there a need to feel like you have to prove how ill you are and make it like some kind of goal to be at rock bottom?

I understand having to prove yourself and your illness to doctors and the government, but amongst peers it should not even cross someones mind to want to be iller or worse off than others, and try to seek some form of approval to have had the toughest time.

It seems to be really common amongst some of the people I have met and loved, which is quite sad.

6 Medicine Bottles, Hanging on the wall

2017

Screw Loose.jpg

Screw Loose

Aluminium Screws & Resin

Stating the obvious a little, this refers to the common term “They’ve got a screw loose”. Perhaps this comments on the stigma surrounding mental health.

Gold Dust.jpg

Gold Dust

9ct Gold Leaf & Resin

Referring to having a decent medication that finally works, which psychiatrists are reluctant to prescribe.

Quick Fix.jpg

Quick Fix

Plasters & Resin

The mental health system attempting to fix a problem by metaphorically putting a plaster on it and expecting it to heal like a physical wound.

Keep Out

KEEP OUT

Photograph & Resin

This is a slightly more complex one – taken from a mould of a medicine bottle which I was prescribed around the time of my diagnosis. Traces from the text from on label have imprinted on the resin.

The full label should read “KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN, Hellesdon Hospital” but the side of the label is wrapped around the corner of the bottle and therefore just reads “KEEP OUT OF Hellesdon Hospital”.

This was significant to me as having been an inpatient, I hope to not return to hospital. The cast of the bottle contains a passport photograph of myself which is obscured by the bottles label, making the  surface of the resin have a frosted appearance. To me this illustrates lack of identity as a service user.

Glamorisation

Glamorisation

Glitter & Resin

Seeing some posts from young adults on Tumblr that advertise mental health as a beautiful thing have completely shocked me. It’s not beautiful, its not fun and its certainly not something to flaunt. Perhaps I could’ve used red or black glitter here rather than an appealing colour.

White Wash.jpg

White Wash

Priadel / Lithium & Resin

I no longer use this medication hence why I have recycled it into an artwork. Lithium kept me stable for a long time but I felt blank and it was like having emulsion roller onto my emotions. I hope that my current medication will continue to keep me well so I do not have to go back to that state.

Plastered

2017

Plasters / polystyrene

This piece is about mental health being treated by quick fixes – it is assumed that a MH problem can be solved by chucking medication at someone or by doing talking therapy, when in fact it is much more difficult and complex. There is no ‘cure’ for many conditions and they are ongoing, with anxiety heightening symptoms for the majority. Plasters are a visual representation of being able to fix something and in this piece of artwork they are used in excess, much like the way the mental health system uses medication to solve a MH problem.

Plastered Head

New Year New Start

It’s been roughly a year since I was discharged from an acute ward.

I’ve Just started my Masters Degree in Fine Art and I couldn’t enjoy it more.

Planning to update this blog more regularly and publish a website like a real life Fine Artist!